Let me start out by saying I consider myself smarter than most people... Not better, not happier, not funnier, not more inclined to make a real difference... Just smarter, or not as dumb, which is more accurate... I've taken several IQ tests, and they come out roughly the same, give or take an IQ point or two... I won't tell what that number is because that's not the point... What IS the point is all of these tests point out that I'm in the top 5-10% of the human race as far as my IQ goes...
This means that 90-95% of the people out there are dumber than I am... Does anyone have ANY idea how that makes me feel?!?! I've done some incredibly stupid things in my life... So if my math is correct, it's conceivable that up to 95% percent of you have done thing up to 95% dumber than I have...
In short, the world is doomed... Doomed, I say! DOOMED!!!! (cue the apocalypse soundtrack)
If anyone bothers to read this, which I know they won't, but on the off chance someone DOES, go, right now, and take one of those free on line IQ tests... Ignore the number, it's not that important. What is important is the percentile... Of the human race, at what percentile do you fall... this is a far more important measure, because this tells you how out numbered you are...
Me and most of my friends tend to fall in the 90-95th percentile... This means we are outnumbered toughly 10-1... Yes, and if I check my math again, that means me and my friends are SCREWED!!!!
Example, when you are stuck in traffic, take a look around you... When I look I see that 9 out of every 10 have the capability to do something up to 90-95% more stupid than anything I've ever done... And they could do it right at that moment, with yours truly as an innocent bystander... But no one said life was fair…
Another example, Find a cardboard crusher that does NOT have a sign on it saying: “DO NOT ENTER”…
I could give you hundreds of examples, but after a while it just becomes depressing… And I refuse to be anything but scared about the whole thing… If I’m depressed, I’ve lost hope… If I’m scared, that means I’m still a realist about it… Yea, it’s delusional, but it’s all I’ve got…
Oh, how I envy those middle grounders, that happy majority at the 50th percentile… they out-number everyone… not too smart as to be aware of the realities, but not dumb enough to walk into a cardboard crusher… Going happily about their daily lives, driving along, talking on a cell phone while reading a newspaper or doing their makeup… I long for that blissful life…
But, no, that is not for me… I’m too busy trying to avoid those people on the road because I’m smart enough to know they are out there… happily waiting for that moment to do something 90-95% dumber than anything I’ve ever done…
It’s thoughts like that that keep me awake at night…
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5 comments:
THen we are doomed.
-SayUncle
As Pris said in Blade Runner: "Then we're stupid and we'll die."
The good news is, so will all the rest.
You think it's bad being in the top 5 to 10 percent, think about being in the top 2% (per various tests spanning a 30 year period -- none of which put me lower than the 98th percentile).
With a graduate degree in engineering, minors in computer science and mathematics, extensive reading in philosophy, history, and science, I am of the opinion that I do not possess suficient intelligence or knowledge to "solve" anybody else's problems (and not all of my own).
Yet, daily I see people who lack my IQ, knowledge and experience who wish to "solve" everybodies problems (often at the point of a gun, i.e., using government force). Talk about feeling outnumbered.
And then there is just the normal day to day living, knowing all the boneheaded stunts I personally have pulled off, and realizing, as you point out, that most of the people around me are likely to do worst at any given moment.
Just keep repeating to people the words of John Wayne: Life is tough; it's even tougher if you're stupid.
'Course, you COULD change it to 'stupider than me', but that's up to you.
'Ecky thump lad, tha's a real wassock.
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